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American Woman Needs Advice about traveling alone to Lagos, Nigeria

edited January 2014 in - West Africa
Hello, I am a 26 year old American lady from Michigan. I have been talking to a man for almost a year now in Lagos, Nigeria and we have had endless nights of webcam discussions. I can feel and see the sincerity in his face, but I am all to far from naive, that may not always be the case. He has asked me to come to Lagos to visit him and that he would pay for my trip. He has also asked me to marry him while I am there and to build a life there with him. He has told me he has spoken to his Mother about me and told her how much he loves me as well  wants me to be his wife. He knows I do not come from a family of wealth. Is it a safe area for me to be traveling alone? Could this be a scam? Is their problems with people trafficking there? I know he is in India for studies right now and is from Nigeria and that's where he wants us to meet. Confused, I dont want social media to influence my perception of a country in whole.


  • Over  the last 24 hours I have learned that for Africa Lagos has the number 1 highest scam rate of anywhere, Dubai is second. So ask yourself, how long it will take of you crouching in shadows in fear before you get tired of it. Oh Lagos the town you speak of is the town I speak of, and outside of scams it is 2nd  in the world to all other crimes!
  • It is absolutely not safe for you to travel to Nigeria to visit a man you've never met! I believe that you have feelings for him, but if he has the resources to pay for your ticket, you need to insist that he comes to visit you at his own expense before anything else can happen. Non-negotiable.
  • I agree absolutely with Anya.

    I also wondered why would a Nigerian be studying in India when Nigeria has excellent education. Study in Europe or USA but India, does not make sense. You only see this man at the end of a computer sitting in a room he could be ANYWHERE. I fail to understand how you can fall in love with someone you only see on a web cam. 

    Scammers often groom men and women for months even years, ask the men and women who married scammers and lost everything sometimes even their lives.
  • If you're a woman traveling to Africa, personal safety is probably the number one concern you have. As long as you follow basic safety precautions though, you should be just fine.
    Ignore cat calls, tsskkss's, whistles and anything else thrown at you verbally by bored men.
    Wear sunglasses to avoid direct eye contact with men.
    Respect the culture you are in.
    Dress conservatively. This is very important in Muslim countries if you want to avoid extra hassle. No mini skirts, shorts, tank tops or tight shirts.
    Don't go out on your own at night.
    Say you are married and carry a photo of your 'husband' with you.
    If you feel you are being harrassed or followed, walk into a shop or hotel and ask for help.
  • edited April 2014
    Freshmod your list is very simplistic and I do not know what countries you refer to on the continent of Africa because each country is very different.
    Some countries are so dangerous women should not go at all and others are relaxed and friendly.

     I would recommend anyone before they travel to refer to the British Foreign and Commonwealth website or their own countries government website that gives clear information on security, culture, dress and danger in the country they want to travel too. These government sites are very reliable and are primarily for their citizens safety.
  • I suggest you make him visit you first to see how genuine he is.Nigerians are smart people though a few genuine ones are there.
    Good luck
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