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Marriage after meeting on internet - advice please

edited April 2011 in - West Africa
Need help after reading so many posting on this website
Meet a man on the net and now wants me to travel to nigeria to marry. Want to go but some advise would be good. Any information on how to check if a passport is for real from nigeria.


  • edited 7:48PM
    Tell him you need the money for the airfare. If he loves you enough to marry you, he'll get the case. If not, he's probably out to scam you. I only say that after reading similar stories on this forum. Search under Nigeria or Scam and see if anything rings a bell.
  • edited 7:48PM
    Hi David F
    thank you for the advise
    I have read so many posting on this formun and just do not know any more.
    I have a copy of his pass port and other documents but just donot have a way to check them. We have also skpye each other and chat nearly ever night.
    Do you know of the lady who went to Nigeria and married the guy she meet on line as I would love to be able to chat to her. (I will search the forums again and give her sign on name if that would help)
  • edited 7:48PM
    Loving 9ja (this is her sign in name and was under are single women safe to travel to nigeria)
    You had a posting on this formun as well
  • edited 7:48PM
    I am from Nigeria, but reside in the USA.
    I know there are so many scams in Nigeria.
    How long have you known this person?
    If may be safer for the person to come and visit you first.
    That way you can see and assess the person while in your country.
    Do not send any money.
    If it sounds too good to be true then it is a scam.
    What country do you reside in?
  • edited 7:48PM
    Hi Ohiba
    I live in Australia. I have meet this man on skype afew times and call each other offen. We chat nearly every day and have started communicating with other memebers of his family (there are happy for both of us) We looked into him coming here but our laws are so strict (and the expense is high). I know that he not a rich man but still would like to meet him. I have copies of offical documents from him and he is now working on a letter of invitation so I can go there to him.

    As a forigener in nigeria will I be safe with him and his family?
    Can you give me some more advise on safety if i go there to meet him?
    And sorry one more question do you know of any other person (woman would be good) that have meet on line and gone to meet there potenial husbands/wifes?

    Thank you for your time will the response (as I always try and find the best in every situtation plus I can not believe that everyone in nigeria is out to hurt or scam westerners)
  • edited 7:48PM
    Hi, My name is Tunde and I am a Nigerian. While the situation is Nigeria has improved it is a very difficult place to get around and is very unusual for people to go there without having met the people they are going to meet first (whether for business or personal). If you do decide to go I would strongly suggest you meet him in Ghana (an english speaking West African country that is just an hour away by air - and there are a lot of reasonably priced flights). Ghana is relatively safe and Nigerian's can travel there without any visa or formality so there should be no reason why he cannot meet you there.

    Frankly I would strongly discourage you from going, but if you do travel please here are some tips.

    1.Immediately get a local SIM card with extra recharge or top up AT THE AIRPORT when you land - no excuses or delays.
    2. Try and keep you phone fully charged (There is public electricity only 10% of the time in Nigeria)
    3. Make sure at least two friends or family know Exactly where you are all times and agree with them that you will contact them at least every other day.

    Best of luck to you.
  • edited 7:48PM
    Hi TundeF

    Thank you for the advise, I will do some research into Ghana and see what our travel advise page says about that. At the moment I was thinking of meeting him in Kenya but the warnings are just as bad there,

    I now about the electricity the as the man has let me know that they have black outs all the time

    I still have not deside to go defently yet but have around another 4 months to make the call.

    Thank you about the phone ( I will do this if I go) plus I have already made of note of our web travel page here is australia (smart traveller) You can log your internary on this site plus I was also going to call into our embassy in Lagos,

    I will book the hotel my self from this end as well so that I know exactly where I am staying (think this is a good safe option).

    Thank you for the advise and quite happy to taken any other suggestion

  • edited 7:48PM

    I have just seen your post.

    Now i see the reason for your questions in other posts.

    I do not see the reason why you should go to a different country (Ghana to meet up) like TundeF suggested, doesn't make sense to me.

    Simply use our service to verify all the facts (all what he told you) you need (know before you travel) about your internet lover. (is he married in Nigeria? you don't know that do you?, where does he stay, is it factual? pictures, himself, his family, are they real, not his wife posing as his sister, etc, etc.

    Australia is a far place, you need to know if your 9 hrs flight to visit him would be worth it.

    Scam Prevent.
    We offer Third Party Verification services in Nigeria and Ghana to prevent you from being scammed.

    We verify and confirm any business or personal offers you receive from Nigeria and Ghana before you part with your money.

    E.g. if it is online relationship, you may request us to take the picture of your online lover for you. to confirm if the person is actually who they are. We go to location based on details you provide to get official picture. E.g. if it is document, we verify it from the Relevant Agency for you and send you the information.

    Please note that we charge for our service depending on the location of your online contact you want us to verify for you.

    If you would like to use our service, send us an email : [email protected]

    If you know anyone who has received any offers (personal or business) from Nigeria or Ghana, do recommend our service, before they lose their hard earned money.

    [email protected]
  • edited 7:48PM
    Until someone in the western community can verify that you are 100% real Im not touching your service. Any company that states it 100% real but does not have a website and runs it email from a different country to the one they are register (and register in the country known for scam) will ring alarm bells in any ones mind.
    My other thing that makes me think there is problems is not that you do not have a website but there are no testiomals about your service on the net. Surely if you have done sure business before some one would have a comment to make about it.
    Please beaware that too many people on this site have been bitten to many times to trust anyone from Nigeria (and that many are watching out for others)
    Please also note it not a 9 hour fight time (nine hours different in time at the moment due to not daylight save times) but more like a 24 hour fight with at less on stop over usually in South Africa (as I have already research this).
  • edited 7:48PM
    @ Angeleyess,

    We are 100% real. As mentioned in response to your question in other post, we have recently introduced this service after seeing many people being scammed. We are probably the first to offer this service , so please take note of our Company name.

    If our verification service prevents people from being scammed, then we are achieving our objectives.

    If too many people have been bitten on this site, i believe if they had known of our service earlier, they'd be thankful.

    Should you decide to give us the benefit of doubt, i believe we will meet your expectations because i know you will tell 250 other people, who will in turn do same. (word of mouth), and that to us will bring us repeat business.

    Won't it be a good idea to use our service to get your facts before embarking on a 24hour flight?

    [email protected]
  • edited 7:48PM
    until one of them do so I will not
  • edited 7:48PM
    But don't go jumping on a 24hr flight without factual information at hand.
  • edited 7:48PM
    @ Angeleyess,

    You know you you have some doubts about your internet lover.

    You can protect your payment to us for our services by using Paypal or

    when we complete your work satisfactorily, only then should you release payment if using escrow services.
  • edited 7:48PM
    Hei! why you scare nigeria there nothing to afraid.and i dont see anything unusual to go and marry if the love is there.just you have to know what are u go to do know yourself is the guy is after money ,after getting out of country or this is real love. im also going to make my marriage in nigeria lagos next year january.keep your eyes open.all best :-)
  • edited 7:48PM
    thank you keitlyn
  • edited 7:48PM
    angeleyes: I am an Australian too, I live in Sydney. I married an Nigerian woman after i met her online, The best thing i've ever done! we are so happy now together.
    About our "strict laws" it is almost too easy for a Nigerian to come to Australia, since both countries are part of the Commonwealth it is very easy to get the papers, i didn't even had to send a leter of invitation. She booked a hotel she went to the australian embassy in Abuja and she got a stamp in her passport within 2 hours.
    And the same with me, I went to the Nigerian Embassy in Canberra and and i just had to fill a form and i was able to travel to Nigeria. The two way flight was 2000 AUD so not too expensive for love. and even the marriage in Lagos was wonderful, all went fine. And we are happy together in Sydney now.
    If he really love you it will not be a big problem for hime to come over. but please don't send him money for the flight, if you wanna pay the flight for him just bye the flight for him and send him an e-ticket. And your love will work out fine.
    Wish you all the best!
  • edited 7:48PM
    angeleyes: If you wanna go for sure if he is real or not just do the same like i did before i asked my wife to come to Australia. Let him go to an Office you trust not to a "100% real institution" let him just go to the Australian Embassy in Abuja. Wherever he lives a flight will not be more tat 22,000 Naira or a bus for 8,000 Naira and he can go with his papers to the Embassy in Abuja. They will check if his papers are real, they will tell you if he is married or not, if you want he can even come there with his family to check if they are for real too. The embassy was really a big help and like i said before it was the best thing i ever did.
    Wish you all the best
  • edited 7:48PM
    hi chris
    when i when to see the travel agent they said I need quite a few things and it was not that easy for me to get a visa
    *proof of funding and financial support
    *proof of travel (return ticket and travel itinerary)
    *a letter of invitation from a host (which included immigration responsibility while i was in nigeria)copy of his first 5 pages of his passport (already have)a letter from his employer and a copy of resident permit (??)
    *church registration certificate if visiting a church
    *International certificate of vaccination for yellow fever

    so you are saying the embassy here can check the paper work i have from him and that we do not need all of the above to get my visa plus they can check if hes married and if ok for me to go ahead and marry him

    As his lawyer said it would cost him money for the letters and resident permit
    and then we have to wait 21 day after placing ads and other checks.
    I am more that willing to go to him but I would like to know if his lawyer is riping him off

    Plus i saw a imagration lawyer here who said that it will cost around 3000 aus to apply for is visa to come here as my husband

    Just what ive been told it does not seam that easy

    Any further help would be great as I sick of paying lawyers if not needed

  • edited 7:48PM
    I am I need of some advise ..I have meet this guy online from Lagos We seem to have clicked he wants to come visit me in Australia which is fine by me but he is asking me to write a letter of invitation, now he has asked I attach power bills licence and bank statement and citizenship proof. I am seriously falling for this guy but i have a bad feeling...Can i trust him...

    Any advise appreciated
  • edited 7:48PM
    @ Me.

    If you send your bank statements to someone you've not met before, just believe you're toast.

    @ Chris, Lucky for you. I would like to believe you did not encounter a scammer in your wife, hence the reason it all went well that ends well.

    if she was someone with a scammers mindset, who wasn't determined to get married but to scam, you wouldn't be happy on here. Thats the difference.
  • edited 7:48PM
    just wondering if anyone in Ghana (Accra to be more specific) has any knowledge of a street or road in or near Accra named: Victoria House, and if you do, is there a hotel or lodging facility on that street named: Laundry Park.

    Any reply would be appreciated
  • edited 7:48PM
    Hi All... wow.. great to read so many comment..I too am in love with a 9ja man who is in Lagos..been communicating just over 12mths now. He wanted to come here and i found that there was alot of paperwork for just a tourist visa. We then decided that i go to him but i am now at a loss cos i hear bad reports about getting a visa for 9ja from the Canberra embassy. And then, if i stay in hotel, he is welcome there but cannot use facilties. For Angeleyees, if u have seen him on skype, talked on fone, know absoloutely wat u can and ur heart still goes "yeah" then follow ur heart. I have never been outside of australia, but i need to take this step..I talk to so many 9ja ppl, and u soon learn who is for real and who is just on the want. IF you are on facebook, search for the NIgerian society in ur city. Not all 9ja are bad.
  • edited 7:48PM

    No, not all Nigerians are bad, but if you take the time to read some of the many sad stories on this forum you'll understand why people must be cautious. Please be careful.

    Check out this article on Online Travel Scams for warning signs you're being scammed.
  • edited 7:48PM
    wow! lol...not all nigerians are scams. dont know where to comment from. this ia a country of about 150million ppl.
  • edited 7:48PM
  • edited 7:48PM
    I just read Angeleyess' story and would like to find out if she did go to Nigeria to meet her man and how it turned out. Angeleyess your story is very similar to mine. I met a Nigerian man on internet and has communicated with him via webcam,skype, and chat everynite for almost 12 months. I am planning to go there in six month time to meet him and get marry so I can sponsor him back to Australia as my husband. Please if you have been there, done that..... give me some advise and tips. I don't really want to be disappointed when I got there. Many thanks.

  • edited 7:48PM
    The only advise I could give to everyone is not to trust everything people says on internet. It is not possible to fall in love with someone without seeing that person first. You need to know if you will like each other, go one step at the time. I almost got scammed and I have been very lucky to have found out this site. I felt that this guy was moving way too fast for me. Thank you so much guys for all the postings I found about him. We need to be careful and look out for one another. There are good people but it is not the case for everyone. I read some sad stories and yes money has a lot of power. Good thing I don`t have much! This time i can say it saved me.
  • edited 7:48PM
    Hi everyone
    I'm still around and yes still planning on going to meet my prince in Lagos Nigeria
    I'm planning to go around the end of April and plan for around 6 weeks there
    I will post my story and let everyone know how it goes but all be careful as there are some bad souls out there.
    I only went on my first trip outside Australia last year to US/Canada. I was just as nevous then and i will be going to Nigeria.
    If any one out there has any positive remarks please post as there are enought negaitive ones out there.
    God Bless
  • edited 7:48PM
    I would like to add that I met a man in Lagos Nigeria on a dating site. He has asked me to marry him; and we have been communicating every day. I had planned to go visit him in September; however, I have not received my passport because of having the wrong birth certificate. I submitted another one from Vital Statistics. Hopefully, this is the correct one and I will receive my passport. Then, I have to get the visa to visit Nigeria. I am planning on having all this done by the middle of October. I have already paid for my plane ticket to go and see my future husband. I am nervous; but he has convinced me that he will protect me while I am there. I have been told to contact the Nigerian Embassy to let them know that you are visiting before going to Nigeria. I know that there are a lot of scams in Nigeria, but I love this guy and he love me. So, I will post in October how my visit went.
  • edited October 2011
    You ladies are dumb, I'm sorry to be so frank about it. I'm Nigerian and I know many guys that sit around with a laptop or at a computer cafe and chat with many woman overseise, particularly white woman. The main goal is to get as much money from yall in the name of love and sad stories as possible. You will hear sob stories about family members having cancer and dying, and being the sole breadwinner of a 20 children household and so forth. American women watch too many disney love stories and Oprah that all you need to hear is "LOVE" and you belief it. This love word has your mind f'd up. Once again I am sorry to be so frank. think about the last man you talked to on the web from nigeria, how long did he take to tell you he loved you very much? I'm going to take a wild guess and say within the first few days. Does this not raise a red flag? I'm not saying don't find love in Nigeria but don't make yourself a MUGU/DUMMY. Never send anything personal such as credit card number SSN or things along that line to someone you just met over the net. especially some one who is in a different continent. Do not travel there to meet the guy because it is extremely dangerous, trust me. If anything, make him come to you. you do not want to risk going to a place where you don't speak or understand their languages. Also keep in mind that the police system is very weak. They will not protect you once bribed by the other guys. many guys are jobless in nigeria so this is the source of income, to con innocent woman looking for Love. I am a nigerian who reside in TX but i know many people back in Nigeria that do this as business. love for you but income for him/her. PLEASE BE ADVISED, PROCEED WITH CAUTION. google i go chop your dollar
  • edited 7:48PM
    i want to ask a question that is it possible to get marry to an unbeliever that is in overeseas. before i will know what to say
  • edited 7:48PM
    Yes its very possible, you just have to be careful
  • @Angeleyess
    Am not advising u to go ahead, but I know of an Aussies woman that is married to a Nigeria; the marriage took place last Dec in Lagos.
    You can find out from her yourself on fb....Tammy Ezeonu. But make sure and be very careful.
    Best of luck.
  • edited 7:48PM
    Hi Don valentino
    Thank you for Tammy name but she has her fb locked down well.
    Do you live in Nigeria?
  • edited 7:48PM
    @ANGELEYESS; I would advise you not to travel to Nigeria alone, meeting someone you have never met before in Nigeria. I am a born Nigeria but reside in the UK since the age of 12, I am aware of the current condition in Nigeria.. there are alot of things you need to take into account. I also met a lot of Nigerian men giving false hope and details to innocent women as yourself.

    The condition in Nigeria is purly not safe for a Nigerian let alone an Aussie woman, so many things to worry about, bad water, Healthcare, just incase you fall ill while out there, transportation, Crime rate, Electricity... Nigeria is a country filled with corruption, lawless system that plays unfairness to the poor. the condition of the accommodation you will be staying in while out there.

    Just because its worked for other people doesnt mean it will work for you, be careful.... there was a recent story about a Canadian lady that went back to Nigeria for the first time to marry her internet sweetheart, stayed in Nigeria for 2 Months and never made it back to Canada, she dead of some sort of virus, and wasnt treated appropriately while in the hospital..

    Her body was flown back to Canada, but her Nigerian's husbands concern was that he wasnt going to get his residence, so at first he held her body hostage for months before the canadian authorities interceded.
  • edited 7:48PM
    to Nigerianigbo

    it is so great to received some tips and honest advice from some one like you. I am going to Nigeria, staying in Ibadan city for the first time, will post my experience when I get back.

  • edited 7:48PM
    Dear all, I'm an Australian woman married with a Nigerian man three weeks ago in Lagos. We met each other on online dating. After dating for a few months, I decided to go to Nigeria to visit him. Everyone here is reacted about my decision going to Nigeria and they advised me not to go Nigeria based on unsafety reason in Nigeria. However, I follow my heart saying if I want to find the truth of our relationship, I should go my self to Nigeria. I'm giving him the three criterias that he should show to me. As he is a fashion designer, he made clothes, I asked him to make a gown for me, his passport and a Nigeria SIM card. Yes, he made me a gown, in fact he made a beautiful wedding gown. I landed in Lagos a day before Chrismas day and two days later we decided to get marriage and went through the wedding consultation at the registrar office at Ikoyri, Lagos. As both of us never married before, we need to approve it to them. My husband would have to show them the letter to prove that he is single and never married before. All went through well and we married on 4 Jan 2012. I'm blessed to know him, his family, his friends. Every night we have a prayer meeting. In the morning and before sleep my husband and me praying together to give thanks and blessing upon our relation ship. Now, I flew back to Melbourne and leaving my husband in Nigeria. He has to stay as he is now starting to prepare his Australian application. We hope any one who can suggest us the best way to get my husband to Australia. It is much appreciated. Thank you.
  • edited 7:48PM
    To whom it concern,
    Especially to someone who is planning to go to Nigeria, please make sure you prepare everything with the listed below:
    1. Make sure you have the visa to Nigeria
    Normally it's a bit difficult to get the visa unless the invitation letter provided is truth.
    2. Make sure you get vassination at least five injections as what I did.
    3. Please stay inside the airport and wait until someone coming to see you and please make sure he/she brought something that can be identified by you. Don't leave the airport because you may got shocking with lot of people on the street looking for money.
    4. If no one come to fetch you, please make sure that ur phone is contactable with Nigeria line. Please use the SIM Traveller, you can get from the post office or from their website.
    5. Please make sure your phone is fully charged
    6. If she/he is for you, she/he will send someone to fetch you in the airport as from my experience.
    7. Please make sure you bring enough cash because Nigeria is a cash trading
    8. If you found out something wrong or no one there, please make sure you book the hotel and the trustful taxi at the airport and don't ever leave airport before you have done all.
    Finally all the best and Enjoy your days down there. Lagos is actually a lovely place to visit.

  • edited 7:48PM
    my advice to the young woman is please stay away for your own safety
    nigerians are scammers stay away for your own good
    from ghana
  • edited 7:48PM
    Hi William, I disagree with your opinion. Not every Nigerians are scammers or bad people. I believe every country produce bad and good people. I had seen with my own eyes the young people there are very obedience to the old people. They will bow down their head or even their body when they visit the old people from their relatives. My husband family will bown down their body and kiss their parents feet when they just come back from travelling. Not only my husband family but his friends do the same way to their parents. If you know them well, they will treat you as a part of their family. Cheers.
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